Gophers Knocked Goofy

The Buckeyes surged forward in their march toward the mythical national championship, cremating Minnesota 49-21 and shooting-up two spots in both major polls. The Buckeyes now occupy second place behind the Cornballs of Nebraska. The college bowl & poll picture is about as clear as mud in a wooden bucket.

Terry Glenn caught a breathtaking 39-yard TD pass in the first quarter. Eddie Charge, Bobby Hoying and Pepe Pearson teamed-up for 28 unanswered second-quarter points. EG began the second half with a spectacular 87-yard TD run, third-longest in OSU history. The OSU offense attacked without mercy.

Early on the vaunted Buckeye defense played less nobly, giving-up two first-quarter TDs. From then on the defense stifled the Goofers completely until a freak desperation TD-pass with 13 seconds left in the game. Defensive end Mike Vrable and free safety Anthony Gwinn won honors as defensive players of the game. Special team player was Dimitrious Stanley, who returned six punts for 75-yards. Hoying & George shared the offensive player award.

Gluefingers Glenn made an incredible diving 45-yard catch early in the second quarter. He came down square on his right shoulder, hitting the Metrodomes dangerously thin, Crap-o Brand artificial turf. After striking the hard green carpet he then bounced-up nearly three feet in the air. Somehow TG held onto the ball, giving him 1,141 career yards. Glenn sailed\ past Chris Carters 1,127 yard OSU record set in 1986. Thats the good news. Terry suffered a slight shoulder separation on the play, forcing him out of the game. His status for the upcoming Illinois gradually improved during the week from very doubtful to merely questionable. Cooper told the press, There is nothing wrong with his feet, and seems optimistic Glenn might receive doctors permission to play. However, knowing Glenns condition, the cowardly Biting Illini might try to go after his
shoulder on chucks and blocks.

Hoying quickly found a new target, hitting, egad... E! George, eight times for 86-yards. By third quarter Eddies numbers were adding up to a possible 200-yard rushing and 100-yard receiving game. However, George left in the third quarter, mindful of Glenns injury, finishing with a respectable 264 total yards and 3 TDs. Hoying helped his Heisman chances as well, completing 16 of 24 passes for 287 yards and no interceptions. The first quarter pass to Glenn was Hoyings 50th career TD, tying Smart Schlichters OSU record. Hoying tossed number 51 to tight end Rickey The Wizard' Dudley. Hoying also moseyed-in from the nine-yardline for another touch.

As usual, the kicking squad provided the game's most amusing entertainment. Mike Malfatt planted his first kick in the endzone but then reverted to his old ways. One kick dribbled out of bounds at the 18, giving Minnesota the ball at their 35. After coming to the sideline, Cooper told Malfatt, When you kick the ball out of bounds, you make me look like an idiot! 'Muff-it Malfatts last kick was so bad that he had to help with the tackle, and suffered a concussion on the play. Coop later said he would assign Mike to the tackling drill until he starts kicking better. Josh Jackson then took over kickoff duties and, not surprisingly, also drilled one out of bounds.

More concerning was the lack of production by the second-string in the second half, especially since the Goofers own the worst defense in the conference. At this point there is frightfully little depth at the line and under center.

The future is not entirely bleak. Andy Katzenmoyer, the 64 240 pound linebacker from Westerville South High School near Columbus, has committed to Ohio State. He runs the 40-yard dash in 4.6 seconds. Ohio Football Recruiting News says he may be the best linebacker out of Ohio since Chris Speilman. Remember when Spiely graced the Wheaties cereal box while at Massillon high school? Eleven recruits to date are committed to OSU, including Katzenmoyer and Clinton Wayne, a 6 4 243 pound defensive end from Centennial High School in Brampton, Ontario. Three offensive linemen committed, Paris Long, Beechcroft, (Columbus), Benji Gilbert Lancaster, Ohio, and center Kurt Murphy, DeSales, (Columbus).

This Saturday Buckeye fans will get a peek at two possible first-round draft picks, linebackers Simeon Rice and Kevin Hardy. The featherheads boast a four-game winning streak in the Horseshoe and have won six of the last seven meetings, so the boys better get after it this week in practice. Illinoiss defense is stronger against the run than the pass, and their offense has been improving all season. They dont turn the ball over too
often, but they dont pass very well. The early line out of Las Vegas was OSU by ten safeties, but since dropped a notch to 19 points. Offensive coordinator Joe Hollis will be
wearing the same underwear he wore in the first nine games.